Sometimes I write for you, sometimes I write for myself. Well, I guess this one has to be for me.
Lately there have been many turbulences in my life. A couple of testing and trying moments came by one after the other and I couldn't help but question the purpose of going through these trials. Little did I know, life has bigger plans for me. With every downturn, comes the cliche "light at the end of the tunnel". After each misfortune, a jewel of opportunity presents itself. Next time, before I start to lose hope and start complaining of how sucky life is, I will give myself a reality slap to remind me that this is just a small price to pay for a bigger reward.
Someone close to me shared this theory:
"Every Negative Event Will Attract Positive One(s). "- Anonymous
These are a list of things that happened to prove that.
1) The Ill Drama
The Negative: Since my return to this beautiful homeland, I've been suffering from allergies, post-nasal drip, insomnia, GI and tonsil problems. I was living on a poor diet and unhealthy lifestyle. The stress and medication were no help to me.
The Positive: After getting tired of being tired and falling ill, I took an interest in my own health. It triggered a series of change in my lifestyle and diet. I keep the stress at a minimum and now I feel healthier and am able to be more proactive. I find that I am more passionate about life and I enjoy cooking again, which may be a legit parameter of my happiness. The more I cook, the happier I am. And vice versa.
Above: Enjoying life to the Max!!! Haha I'm too lazy to find a fitting image so this one shall suffice to prove that I am enjoying every tidbits of life again.
2) The Love Drama
The Negative: I have qualms about sharing this, but I must remember that this happened. After a big outburst of two people who misunderstood and lack respect for each other, we went through a lot of pain, heartache, doubts and uncertainty.
The Positive: We learned a thing or two about what it takes for a relationship to work and realized we needed to slow down. I learned to not wear my heart on my sleeve,to reserve my excitement for future, not to over-analyze and idealize people and to not keep all my eggs in one basket. I hope he learned to be more sensitive and attune to the needs of others, carefully string his words before he speaks and reserve his judgement if he lacks the information. We both learned a great deal about each other and we grow from this experience, as hurtful as it may be.
Above: My absolute favorite :delicate hydrangeas, aromatic stargazer lilies and romantic red roses. As cheesy as it is, flowers do make an effective sorry gift. I can say it softens me up by hmmmm....ALOT. I wish that I can get them during happy moments too.
3) The Neighbor Drama
Before I start, it is necessary to put up these pictures for your better understanding
Above: I have a very territorial neighbor who likes to put potted-plants relatively far from the curb to prevent others to park in this parking-scarce neighborhood. They used to have FOUR pots on the road but somehow it was reduced to only one pot. I guess that's an improvement.
Above: For aesthetic purpose, this out-of place potted plant was placed between my house (right) and their house to mark the division of our property and also to prevent any parked car to invade their precious compound, regardless of their HUGE ASS GATE ,big enough to fit a trash pickup.
Above: You see the gate that can fit this one or two persons? Note that it can't fit a car. No one is allowed to block this holy gate to heavens. Apparently, when the gate is blocked, the poor soul who needs to transition lacks the ability to walk around the blockage and onto the grassy area to make it through the sacred door.
To make this story longer than necessary, I parked my car where this car is one night as I was concerned of my safety. The neighborhood gets freakishly dark and has poor lighting at night. Though I am aware of their territorial attitude, I thought they would have enough discretion to let a scared and weak single woman who may be in danger to park in front of the holy sacred gate. But no.....
Above: The deathly reminder I received on my car the morning after I blocked the gate of Nirvana. I felt a little threatened by the choice of color and the fact that the writing covers the whole paper. A little note would do, really.
Anyway it is pointless to go on and on about this. I know law enforcement may have their hands too full to do anything about this and I think I will be the bigger person and not let petty people get to me.
The Negative: An embarrassing confrontation gone down ala Jerry Springer. Believe me it's so ghetto I can't even start to explain how low these people behaved. Yelling and screaming and intruding personal space with threatening body gestures. Gosh, I am not proud of myself either for breaking into tears and saying hurtful things but this ugly event needed to happen.
The Positive: Seeing how horrific things were, my father who was at the scene is now scared for my life. Haha. I think he may be too protective of me and now we're going to buy a house together! (Any property advice?Anyone?) It is such a big deal for me! Now I don't hate my neighbor anymore. Next time I see her I will kiss her stinky toe and thank her for getting me a new crib! Thanks territorial neighbor!
Now, suck that! Ha!
4) The Drama Mama
Well this last one is a little too personal for me to share, but ah well I shall do it anyway.
The Negative: The loss of a mother who I dearly need, love and miss everyday.
The Positive: The strength that I get from the fact that she is in me, half of me is made of her and her spirit that goes on even when she is not physically present. She became my conscience and guidance, as I always think of what she'd do or feel whenever I am in a dilemma. I became more independent, nurturing and selfless, just like her. My love for her deepens and I never let self-pity take over my life. Her positivity carries on in me and the lives she left behind (Akak and Apit).
Above: "There are ups and downs but I believe in being always optimistic. It's pointless to live a life of fear and regrets"-
Mama after her cancer diagnosis written in her last journal.
